It takes ages to run, isn't optimized at all (bad by even my standards - it queries sqlite for the same value over and over again in a single loop), runs off basic TF-IDF and nothing fancier, and fails to make obvious connections (as the screenshot below illustrates).

I feel nervous even posting about it because who knows how it'll turn out? Or if it'll ever really work out there in the real world?

But it's a start, and I'm a wee bit proud (and apprehensive).